My way to happiness

Well, here we go….Day 2 arrived. My goals for today are to have my breakfast, take it easy with lunch, have a healthy dinner and work out. And I decided (at least for now) to focus on the things a do accomplish and not on the things I don’t. Let’s see how that works out for me.

Lets talk about yesterday (Day 1) and let’s start with the good things I did:

Yesterday I did really good! I had my breakfast (shredded wheat with low fat milk). That was a good start for me. I had breakfast, I am not hungry in the morning and I don’t like to eat anything in the morning. The only mornings I am reallly hungry are Sunday mornings. Maybe because I have them with my husband together? I don’t know, but during the week it is a struggle for me to eat in the morning. Anyway, I did it! Yeah!

I worked out on my treadmill. I went for 70 minutes and made it 4.62 miles! I haded myself for even going on the treadmill for the first 60 minutes, but I did it and that is what counts.

When I got out of the shower my sweet husband had a healthy salad waiting for me. Yummy! And the best thing…he prepared it… I didn’t had to do anything in the kitchen last night!!!!!!!!!!!!! So, while he ate is pasta with tomato sauce (with plenty of sausage in it!), I had my green salad! And the “bad” thing, he is not going to gain an ounce! The salad was really good and I felt satisfied but I can tell you…my sweet tooth wasn’t waiting for long! Boy did I had to fight. Reminded me off when I quit smoking and my brain kept telling me to have one more cigarette. Same last night…boy did I wanted that cookie!!!!!!! I could hear myself thinking….one cookie wont hurt you……but………………I didn’t!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn’t had that cookie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nothing…..well, a bottle of seltzer water…but nothing sweet. No cookie, no chocolate, no candy…..nothing. I stayed strong!

Okay, here it comes, but only because I have to be honest here. My lunch ……. a sandwich from dominos. I know I know….but it tasted good! Okay, that is enough on the things I did wrong! Like I said, I want to concentrate on the good things and the things I do right this time around.

I would say overall I did really really good yesterday.

And my husband….I love him….he doesn’t know what I am going thru and doesn’t quite understand why it is so hard, but he want’s to be there for me and help. So he decided to help me out with taking care of the dinner while I am working out. That is such a big help. We work 10-12 hours every day. We leave the house by 6 a.m. and usally are back by 6-7 pm. I always had to take care of dinner. And when I have to cook for another hour or so, there is not much time for me to work out. Nor do I really feel like working out after just being in the kitchen for an hour. So for him to take over the kitchen at night, is going to be a big change for me. A good change. One: I can spend the hour working out, and Two: no more excuses for me to not work out.

I feel good, with my husband taking over some housework and you guys here for moral support…what can stop me? The only one in my way now is myself and I am working day by day to take care of that.

Let’s get started on Day 2!

Here I am…again…committing to change my life style…again…making the promise to myself to eat healthier and to work out every day…again. I can’t even count how many times I tried and failed. I am always so excited at first and I do really good for about 2-4 weeks, then I am right back to my old habits. Everything I worked for those weeks, all the pounds lost will be kicked to the curb. Pound by pound the weight starts creeping up again and when I am back to where I started before I get in that mood again where I am ready to change my life.

I don’t know why it is so hard for me to stay committed. When it comes to my family or my work…I am committed 100% and more, but when it comes to myself I can’t do it. I wonder if it is so hard because loosing weight is the one thing where I am all by myself. I don’t have anybody to help me. My husband really tries to be there for me, but he doesn’t know what I am going thru and doesn’t understand why it is so hard to loose the weight. He is skinny (so is his family) and can eat whatever he wants without gaining a pound. I am on the other hand just have to look at his food and gain five pounds.

 Well, don’t they always say you have to set goals first? Here are my goals (again)…

Lose weight

Be fit and healthy

Maybe…one day…to love what I see in the mirror!